What is it? Did our ancestors experience it? Do you actually know whether you have depression or is it just a thought? Well, so many unanswered queries we have in our minds. Let’s see our ancestors or historic people as well. They had a purpose, many people or i would say many close ones with similar purposes. It can be family togetherness, making each other happy or historic people whose mission was independence. That time, “Oh am I having depression?” wasn’t in their minds. There weren’t even technology like vehicles or mobiles and such home appliances like television or even washing machines. Still they lived right? None even thought of committing suicide unlike today’s generation humans, who commit suicide on any issues as for them it’s a major problem, either their family or relationship not to forget financial issues.
In today’s era, we are living together in a big family, still we feel left out. We live expecting and some live making others happy, not considering their own happiness or peace of minds, which majority of humans are in categories of either house wives, women or even children and men.
There are cases where a rich family girl aged just 22 committed suicide because of depression. Whereas many farmers commit suicide as they couldn’t repay their loans, or marry off their daughters.
Whether you live with your family or you live alone, you will face depression if you keep expectations. You expect and if it’s not fulfilled, you feel sad and then depressed with your life and your surrounding too. You don’t like to go out or interact with outsides, let alone family. Nothing interests you at all. The person you were years ago, enjoying music or going for shopping or meeting friends or even being a workaholic, nothing seems interesting.
Those days you would smile, laugh and even had fun doing simple things that interested you, like playing and sports, going for treks and so on. Now it’s not interesting even to get up and face life.
Why? Why have you made yourself so isolated? Just because you had expectations from your family, friends or colleagues, whose behaviour wasn’t what you expected doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world. Stop expecting. Let it go. That time, that phase has long gone. Don’t ponder on if’s and but’s. Start up new. Look after yourself, your health, prioritise your own happiness first.
Start looking at your own life from a third person’s view. What he/she doesn’t have, you might be having it…Be it skill or any hobby or even soft skills. Never ever underestimate yourself or compare with others. Stop following any star hobbies or fashion. After all they are humans too like you. You do your own fashion. Nobody’s stopping you. Daily look at yourself at the mirror and smile. This life is precious and god sent you with a purpose, which you have to recognise through signs He sends. Not all are lucky as you are, isn’t it?
How would you come out of depression?
There are millions of ways to cure yourself rather than taking this and that medicines. Observe your surroundings.
First and foremost you have to see yourself as lucky. You were lucky to get education, you were, are and will be lucky that your body is healthy and there are not any major health issues like disability or lack of any organ or parts.
You have family members around you or if you aren’t with them, you have friends, colleagues, birds, animals and nature around you all the time.
Take a deep breath and look around you every time for signs from the God. You may seem disappointed (whether it’s no job, no satisfactory job, relationship or family relations, God always shows you signs that says” Why are you worrying? I am everywhere.”
You can make any song as your daily theme song your mood. Like, Pretty woman walking down the street, or Uptown Girl, and so on. If you are a guy these won’t be your theme songs, right? Your theme songs would be “It’s my life” and so on. If you are spiritual and religious, you can make it a point to listen to many devotional songs available nowadays online.
Talk to your near ones, especially your family. Even if there have been misunderstanding or if they aren’t friendly, just say “Hi”. That’s all. There are many families where some of the members have grudges. Let them hold to their thoughts or misconceptions. You simply be happy. If you have friends or colleagues, even Face book friends, you will find a lot of similar people like you, same like you, whom you can refer as ”Soul Sisters”. Many a times, faraway friends understand you then your close ones.
Grab this opportunity to polish your talent and hobbies. Whether it’s trekking, gardening, cooking or even baking.
Look around you and the news where farmers lost everything he had sowed and because of natural calamity, he lost everything. Sometimes think from their viewpoint too. Not everyone is as lucky as you are dear.
Most of the people get distracted when they are depressed. If you listen to their problems, you either might think it’s not that big issue or they don’t know what they have as they are more focused on what they don’t have. For some, Love is important but their love and care is taken for granted by their own family and friends. Never expect anything from anybody, whether he/she is your dear and near ones or even your circle of friends.
If you know Bhagwad Gita or if you have read it, remember Lord Krishna’s words. “You have come alone in this world and you will go alone”.
Some opt for yoga which is of course extremely good for not only your body but even for your inner growth. Any anxiety or depression you have will vanish.
Remember, there might be distractions during this period. You may be lured to go for certain relationships or develop habits like drinking or smoking. Just follow your instincts. If your mind says it’s bad, then it’s bad. Yes, your mind and psychic instinct gets more active during this period. Such routes may seem as full of red roses and beautiful, but it’s not. Ultimately, you are harming your body, that’s all. Think about that.
Have you any dreams or aspirations? Then go for it. Who’s stopping you from doing it? Watch or read not only motivational and successful movies/books, but also failure stories. In doing so, you will know how to get up yourself and how to rejuvenate yourself. There may be situations where you will fall and you will have to motivate yourself to get up and face the world.
On a positive note, you are alive for a purpose which you have to reckon. Look out for signs, like butterfly, feathers, even quotes, birds, animals or people. These are signs sent by angels. If you don’t believe in such things, it is okay. Think positively. Grab that food which you have been craving for for many years. If you are jobless, take up a job which scares you or which poses many challenges. That way, you will know your own hidden skills and capabilities. Listen to your own self. Not everyone can be in your shoes. Yes, if you look back at yourself and some of your achievements, not many can do that action or can’t even think about it.
These achievements like doing a job, working nonstop, multitasking, and many things aren’t small achievements. But they are big. You can think, you can put out your views and opinions; you can walk, talk and even run. Not many are lucky as you are. Depression isn’t there actually. It gets grown in our minds and creates a lot of negative misunderstanding in our minds. Just erase those thoughts. Focus on good things you have in your life.
– By Girija Bhat.